Wednesday, January 13, 2010

My Politically Incorrect Medical Education

Yesterday we had a lecture on EKG interpretation and the cardiologist giving the lecture was chatting about using the R-R interval to calculate heart rate. It went like this:

"Take 300 and divide it by the number of small squares between the R to R interval...that gives you the HR....so....if there are 2 squares between the R-R what is the HR...?"

-Everyone stares back in silence.

"150!!" he says exasperatedly.

"So look at this one...there are 3 squares between the R-R interval....what does that make the HR?"

-Silence again.

"JEAZUS! Are ye RETARDED? It's NOT that complicated!!"

I almost lost my sip of tea out the nose.

One of the many hilarious quirks of Ireland and Irish medical training. The consultants actually yell "JEAZUS", and call you "retarded" during lecture, and no one even blinks an eye.

7 comments:

Old MD Girl said...

But "retarded" flows off the tongue so much better than "mentally challenged!"

Hee.

EKGs are awesome.

Keet said...

It's so true. And a good 'JEAZUS!' beats 'jeepers' any day. Besides, maybe he meant retarded in the delayed development sense, oh wait, thats the same. LOL
I think in the UK they call it "learning difficulties", and their is a whole specialist field of nursing for it. OH UK, you make me laugh sometimes.

simmers said...

But you gotta admit; it was a pretty simple mental leap he was asking for.


~silence~


I'm an asshole?
(not sure if that's better than being a retard)

Albinoblackbear said...

OMDG: Yes and yes. Cardiac is always my favorite part of the ED. A lot of nurses don't like it, which was great because I happily take the cardiac beds.

K--Yeah, it is pure comedy. I have also heard "feck" and "f&ck" dropped by profs in class. Swearing is just not a faux pas here at ALL.

Simmers--Dammit Jim we're DOCTORS not mathematicians!

Obviously the 11 people who were paying attention could have answered but no one likes to break the herd silence. No you're not an asshole.

Rogue Medic said...

I don't suppose this kind of blasphemy is seen as a violation of the new blasphemy laws?

OTOH, the word verification is licepod?!?!

I may need to tidy up a bit, but my apartment is much nicer than that. And my hair is too short for even a louse to grab a hold of. Take it back! Or does it mean something different in Gaelic?

Albinoblackbear said...

Rogue--you are insane. I have no idea where you get these web sources from!!! :P

'Licepod' is a traditional girls name here in Ireland but it's pronounced 'Lindsay'.

Sort of like Aoife (pronounced Eee-fa) or Eibhann (pronounced Eileen).

Rogue Medic said...

I have a major in heresy with a minor in blasphemy, so I find out about this through my professional journal - Your Daily Blasphemy.

I used to think that, when visiting Ireland, the greater threat to my safety was entering a pub in the North for some variety beyond Smithwicks, Harp, and Guinness. Now it is entering a discussion in the South, that even tangentially addresses the sanity of killing people in the name of any deity.

I don't have 25 thousand euros, regardless of conversion rate - that's it! I could convert to Islaam. Hide inside a burkha. They'd never find me. Black is always fashionable and supposed to be slimming. Hmmm. Maybe this stuff is worth killing over. Do they have them in taffeta?


So, you are calling me Lindsay?

I thought I could trust you with my secret identity.

When they are discussing their method of interpreting ECG rhythms, would it be appropriate to refer to that method as the rhythm method?