Sunday, March 25, 2012

Hard Mattress

After a somewhat lengthy orthopedic surgery where I had been holding a foot / leg up off the table, Dr. Boots handed over the suture material and told me to get to work.

Umm...should I come around to the other side of the table?

Dr. Boots:
No, sweetheart just get to work, this man's got a bloody tourniquet on! We don't have time for dancing around. Put in some mattress sutures

(Some of you might scoff at the fact that I haven't mastered the mattress suture. As a potentially aspiring surgeon I maybe should be able to do them in my sleep, however, I spent most of my time in general surgery trying to perfect my sub-cue stitches and hand-tying. Bad medical student, BAD!)

And now I have.

And they were a thing of beauty. All two of them. Damn you arthroscopy and your tiny wounds!

Dr. Boots:
There, that wasn't so bad now. No need for all the shivering and shaking. You know my 17 year old daughter can do mattress sutures, no problem. She taught herself.

(Surgical Drape) Curtain Falls. 

[For the hands were shaking because my forearm muscles were maxed out from assisting...I swear! I should also add, Dr. Boots is amazing and kind of like the slightly-unimpressed-but-fantastic-teacher orthopedic-surgeon-father I never had. Above example illustrates the way we communicate. Me, hopeless rube in ortho...him ortho king. Get it?]


Justin said...

Nice work! Weirdly enough, I'm just now watching the first season (1967? something like that) of Star Trek for the first time via Netflix while also learning how to sew the mattress suture - which I will hopefully NOT have forgotten once the time to use it actually gets here...

Absentbabinski said...

I was going to go with:

"Dammit, Jim! I'm a doctor, not an upholsterer!"


Gratz on your sweet suturing skillz, though. Should I bring a needle and thread to the pub?